Fueled by Lust: Severus (Siren Publishing Classic) Page 16

  She shook her head and blew on the hot liquid. “No. This is great.”

  He watched as she took tiny sips and hummed her approval. “You want to watch a movie, or something?”

  Cassie nodded and smiled. “Yes. That sounds good. I could use a distraction.”

  The heat must have helped her throat. Her voice sounded almost back to normal. Severus led her into the living room and pointed out his DVD collection. “Your choice.”

  She set the cocoa on the coffee table and started looking through his collection. She turned to him and gave him a little smirk before handing him The Usual Suspects.

  If he didn’t love her before, he would have fallen right then and there. A sense of humor in a dire situation, plus a Spacey fan. What’s not to love? He loaded the DVD and moved back to the couch. She immediately surprised him when she sat next to him and snuggled up against him. He smiled, put his arm around her and pulled her closer.

  As the movie played on, she began to slouch heavily against his chest. He saw that she wasn’t asleep, but her lids were beginning to droop. He grabbed a pillow and placed it on his lap and gently pushed her to rest her head on the pillow. Severus knew he shouldn’t, but he couldn’t stop himself from running his fingers through her hair. Minutes later, he glanced down to see she’d fallen asleep. He liked the feeling of her draped over his body and wanted to touch her skin, but she was still wrapped up in his bathrobe. All too soon, the movie ended. He didn’t want to move, but knew she needed to be somewhere comfortable. Gently, he maneuvered her around until he could pick her up.

  On the way to the guest room he paused in front of his bedroom. What he wouldn’t give to just carry her over to that king-size and slide in beside her. He wanted to feel her warm body next to his, to listen to her breathe, and to wake with her beside him. He chastised himself for the thought. Here she was, just having endured a horrific attack, and all he could think about was himself. She needed to rest and be left alone. He grudgingly continued to the guest room and gently laid her on the bed. To keep from waking her, he pulled a blanket from the closet and draped it over her. He stared down at her relaxed face and smiled at the soft snores coming from her sweet mouth. “My lovely mellis. What a day you have had.” He ran his finger along her soft cheek, kissed her lightly on the forehead, and left the room.

  After a quick shower, he debated whether to put on a pair of boxers. He usually slept nude, but if Cassie needed something he wanted to get there in a hurry. As he pulled the black briefs up his hips, he couldn’t take his eyes off the valet box lying inches from his nose. Sighing, he did the opposite of what his mind was screaming for him to do.

  Severus opened the lid and pulled his mating necklace out by the chain and dangled it in front of his face. While he stared at the gleaming sheen of the predator tooth, various questions ran through his mind. What would he do if he placed it around his neck and the mineral stayed cold? How would his heart take it if he found out that he was in love with a female whose energy wasn’t compatible with his? He would be unable to merge his life force, unable to have children with her, and most importantly, he would outlive her. Worse, what if he found she was his mate and she didn’t want to be part of his life? What then? He snorted in derision at his muddled brain. “Grow a pair, Severus. Find out and get it over with.” Without fanfare, he slipped the chain over his head.

  As soon as the mineral touched his skin, excruciating pain struck him squarely in the chest. Unbearable heat exploded throughout his body and took him to his knees. He bit his lip to keep from crying out and promptly collapsed to the floor. He grasped the tooth and pulled it away from his chest, only to release it as it seared his hand. Within minutes the necklace cooled slightly and remained warm to the touch. He lay there for several minutes before he was able to roll to his back and catch his breath. He stared down at the mineral in awe. For such a small thing, it had wasted him. He smiled and realized he would gladly experience it again. She was his mate.

  Severus staggered over to the bed and sat down. There was no doubt remaining, no misunderstanding of the energy shift he’d felt that night in the elevator, no lingering thoughts that he would never find the one female that belonged to him. It was Cassie. His female was Cassie.

  His first instinct was to rush to her room and pull her into his arms. He wanted to express his love for her and explain what she was to him, what they were to each other. “No, you can’t be selfish, Severus.” She had already been frightened once today. He couldn’t do that to her. He would wait. Yes, he would wait a while longer and let her find out about the Insedi from the three of them. She would believe Lina before she would ever believe him right now. He remembered Lina’s reaction and her belief that he and Drusus were insane. They had to mist to prove themselves. No, he would wait. He would focus on her protection and he would wait. He crawled under the sheets and drifted into a fitful sleep.

  * * * *

  Severus woke, yet he knew he was in a dream. He recognized the swirling, magenta grasses of his beloved home world. The rushing sound of water let him know he knelt beside the Trancis River. A soft breeze cooled his cheeks even as the sun warmed his flesh. He could smell the fragrant leaves of the yushta tree as its whip-thin, smooth branches tapped lightly against his skin, seeking his attention. He reached up, confused at the moisture drifting down his face. He felt immense sadness and grief despite the beauty of his surroundings.

  Then he remembered this was the day of Foemina Mortem—the female death. What was first thought to be a relatively minor incident of illness among the female population escalated to a complete annihilation of their gender within a matter of days. The healers were baffled, unable to determine a cause in time to develop an inoculation, too late to stop the incredibly fast killer, and much too late to realize the water that had sustained life was now tainted with death. Husbands, fathers, and brothers to forever carry the burden of lifting cool water to the mouths of their ill loved ones and killing them as surely as if they drove a knife through their heart. He clutched his palms to his ears, still hearing the gut-wrenching, anguished cries of fathers watching their tiny babes die at their mate’s breast only to swirl into near madness as she followed shortly afterwards.

  Severus realized this was where he had run after his mother had taken her last breath. He couldn’t look into her lifeless eyes one more moment or bear watching his father fall to his knees and rip at his flesh. The strongest male he had ever known was now a broken, inconsolable shell.

  He lifted his eyes and night had fallen. Staring across the swirling black waters of the Trancis to the Magna Camporum—the Great Plains—he watched as legions of men marched through the swirling grasses, their backs bowed with grief and their deceased. The scent of death lay heavy upon the air while billowing, thick smoke rising from thousands upon thousands of fires stretched as far as the eye could see. Masculine voices rose in rhythmic chants for a peaceful transition to Dii. His spine stiffened as his ears picked up a most plaintive cry, gurgling words of grief lodged within a closed throat. His eyes widened as he looked down to his arms clutching a cold, lifeless body to his chest. He loosened his hold and looked into the face of his dead. It was he screaming the guttural cry. It was he unable to voice the depth of his grief, for it was he staring into the dull, lifeless eyes of his Cassie.

  Severus yanked himself from the horrifying dream, further startled to find a shadowed form standing next to his bed. He realized it was Cassie before he could lift his fist to strike the apparition. He fought to keep from yanking her into his arms.

  “What is it, Cassie? Are you okay?” He shifted and reached for the light next to the bed. His hand was unsteady from the dream that still clung to his thoughts. For six years the dreaded nightmare had never revealed the face of his dead, until now.

  Cassie grabbed his wrist and whispered, “No. No, don’t turn it on. I…I just got a little spooked when I woke up. I thought I heard someone yell. I’m not used to waking in a strange bed, so I’m he
aring things. Um…can I stay in here with you? I…if you don’t want me in here, I’ll just go watch some TV, or something.”

  Severus was speechless for a moment. Could this actually be happening? He saw her start to turn and he quickly stopped her. “No. I mean, please. Yes. You can stay here. It is not a problem, sweetness. Here, let me move over for you.” He hurriedly shifted to the side and pulled the cover back to allow her to get in the bed. She hesitated and he watched her place her phone and a book on his nightstand. It appeared she’d planned to be turned away. The room had enough moonlight filtering in for him to notice she wore a dark T-shirt that fell just above her knees. Faded lettering splashed across the front, but he couldn’t make out the words as she crawled beneath the sheets. He thought it was the sexiest thing he had ever seen in his life.

  They lay on their sides facing each other for a few moments before Cassie broke the silence. “Severus?”

  “Yes?”

  “Thank you for what you did today. You know. Taking such good care of me when I completely lost it. You were so calm. I don’t think I handled it very well. I’m sorry.”

  Severus reached out and pushed her hair away from her face. He moved his hand back to his side before he went any further. “Baby, don’t think like that. You got a full blast of the harshest pepper spray on the market. Consider that for a moment and you’ll realize you were remarkable. I’m proud of you.”

  She put a hand over her eyes and rolled to her back. “It feels like a dream. God, Severus. As bad as that was, it could have been worse. What if that had been a bomb? Geez! I want to hurt someone so bad. They’ve completely ruined my joy at opening presents. I don’t have much in life, and now they’ve taken that, too. The bastards!”

  Severus grabbed her hand and pulled her back to her side. He kept her hand within his. “I know how you feel, sweetness. I shudder every time I think of it. But, don’t let them win. Don’t let them destroy any part of you.” He could see her eyes glitter with unshed tears. His brave Cassie fought hard to maintain her cool. Her words came out low, as if she were sharing a secret.

  “I spent my whole childhood being afraid, Severus. I don’t want to feel that way again. I know that I come across brash and tactless, but I know why I act that way. It’s the only armor that I could find to keep the bullies and the punks from running me over like Mitchell did.”

  She hesitated and he heard her swallow. He stayed quiet, knowing this was difficult to tell.

  “Mitchell was my sperm donor. I can’t bear to call him father. The title gives him too much credit. I’ve got problems because of him. I don’t know what kid wouldn’t, but it’s still hard for me to trust easily. Just when I start letting my guard down, I get this very big wake-up call to shut down and trust nothing.”

  He felt her index finger run lightly across his palm. He wanted to scoop her up and kiss the shit out of her, but was afraid to spook her while she was so vulnerable.

  “I’m not going to let it, though. I just have to pay attention. I don’t want to be afraid anymore and I don’t want to put all of these walls back up. I’m too tired to keep them in place. Does that make sense?”

  Severus squeezed her hand and smiled. “Yes. It makes perfect sense. Don’t change on me, Cassie. I like you just the way you are. Brash and tactless.”

  Cassie pulled her hand from his and punched him on the arm. “Asshole.” Her soft laughter pleased him.

  “Go to sleep, sweetness. We have a big day ahead of us tomorrow. I’m sure Cato will find something that will help us shut this guy down.”

  “Okay.” She started to turn to her back again, then hesitated. “Severus?”

  “Yes, mellis?”

  “I trust you. You, Cato, and Drusus. I trust each of you. Lina was the only one I ever trusted. So, thank you for proving that there are good guys out there.”

  Severus felt his throat tighten. He swallowed hard and tried to keep his voice calm. Her words had reached out and clutched his heart and he was afraid he was about to unman himself and cry like a baby.

  “Thank you, sweetness. You have mine as well.”

  Cassie smiled and rolled to her back. The covers were pulled up to her chin and she closed her eyes.

  Severus rolled to his back and stared up at the dark ceiling. He was never more aware of a female in his presence as he was right now.

  Chapter 21

  Severus knew he should close his eyes and get some sleep but he couldn’t. He was hyperaware of Cassie’s warm body just a mere foot away from his. If he were smart, he’d scoot over to the other side of the bed and he could pretend she wasn’t in the room. Maybe if he just rolled over to his side with his back to her it would help. Even as he thought of all the different ways he could handle this, his muscles refused to budge. They were perfectly happy for him to lie flat on his back so he could see her from the corner of his eye. I’m such a sap.

  Resigned to the fact that he wasn’t going anywhere, he closed his eyes and started thinking of anything to distract himself. He thought about the training center, but that just reminded him of his last visit. It was the day he took Cassie to the dinner. He pushed the images of her in that knockout dress to the side and thought about the new dance routine he and Maxim had been working on before all this craziness started. But that only led to him wondering if Cassie would like the gladiator outfit he’d found. Would she come to the stage and let him absorb her lust into his body while he removed the chest armor and pulled her hand up to rub along his skin? He gritted his teeth and forced the image to dissipate.

  He willed his cock to go back to sleep, but the bastard was up and paying attention. He was just about to start scooting quietly out of the bed when an overwhelming aroma of orange-blossoms wrapped around his face and held him firmly in place. Inferni! So delicious. He breathed in heavily and promptly gave up on controlling his dick. It had caught a whiff and was now throbbing relentlessly against his stomach. It was the light touch against his arm that caused a low moan to escape his lips. Cassie’s whispered word trailed along his skin like a soft kiss. He was lost.

  “Severus?”

  He gritted his teeth, heart thundering in his chest. “Yes, baby?”

  “You can tell me to shut up, even kick me out of your room and I won’t get mad. But, I have to ask you something. Okay?”

  Severus swallowed hard, afraid to hear but afraid not to ask. “Anything, sweetness. Ask me anything.”

  “Will you…can I…I want to be with you. I want to touch you. I need you, Severus. Will you…”

  Severus had heard enough. He rolled her over in a twist of sheets and legs and captured her mouth with his.

  He groaned when he felt Cassie melt into his arms and wrap her fingers in his hair. He knew he was clutching her too tightly and willed his arms to relax. He moved his hand up to her jawline and angled her for a deeper kiss. She tasted so damn good. Her soft tongue caressed against his before she clamped her lips around his tongue and began to suck. He almost came in his boxers just from the thought of her sucking on any part of his body. He remembered his vision of her lips wrapped around his cock and the trust she had shown in her honey-brown eyes. He pulled back from her mouth before he lost it completely. He softly nipped her lower lip before trailing his mouth down the side of her cheek and latching onto her earlobe. He ran his tongue along the curve and breathed heavily into her ear. “Yes. Yes. I want you, too. Anything, sweetness. Just tell me what you want.”

  He felt her shiver and moan at his words. Her nails dug into his sides and she undulated against his belly. He felt chills run across his skin from the sensual reaction.

  “Severus, please. I want you inside me. I need you inside me. I don’t want it slow. I want you to take me.”

  He growled against the side of her neck and pushed his groin against her thigh. “Do you feel that? I’m going to give you exactly what you want, baby. Do you want me to put on a condom? Tell me quickly or I’m going to take you bare. I’ve never taken a woman bare
, but I want you that way. I’m clean, baby. Tell me. Tell me now or I’ll decide for us.” He was having a hard time focusing on her words, but he slowed long enough to grasp the meaning between her panted breaths.

  “I’m on the pill…always used condoms…clean, too. Yes…oh god yes. I trust you. Hurry.”

  That was all he needed to take control. He rolled to the side and caught his boxers at the waist and pushed them off his body. He was upright and kneeling between her legs in the next breath. He had no other thoughts but to get inside of his mate. To mark her. To own her. To love her. He grabbed the bottom of her T-shirt and quickly yanked it up her body and over her head. He thought himself insane for pausing long enough to grin at the faded letters spelling “Pantera” across the front. He tossed the shirt to the side and looked down at her as he pulled her legs up to wrap around his hips.

  Her arms were still up over her head and lax against the pillows, her hair swept to the side, a bright glow against the darkness of his sheets. Her eyes were narrowed and she was biting on the edge of her lower lip as she stared at his cock bobbing and bouncing against his stomach before flipping those amber orbs back up to him. Gods damn she was beautiful.

  Her breasts were two perfect mounds of gorgeous perched on her chest. Her skin was golden and her nipples a light coral shade. The nipples stood erect and his mouth watered for a taste. Later. Yes. He would spend an inordinate amount of time getting to know them later. Right now he wanted in her and he wanted it now. His gaze continued down her body. She had a small waist that flared to nicely rounded hips. Her belly was flat and she had a tiny bellybutton that he wanted to stick his tongue in. He shook his head and took in the black lace thong running a sleek line from her hips to her crotch, making her legs look long and lean. He reached forward and clamped his hand in the material. He looked up into her gorgeous, golden eyes and ripped the material from her body.